Right in own eyes

A couple of days ago, I visited a salon to get a haircut.  It was 8 in the evening, but the lighting and the hustle inside the salon had camouflaged the dusk. I settled in one of the seats at the extreme corner and a middle-aged hairdresser came to me and gracefully started working on my hair. She cut the ends of my tresses and blow dried it perfectly. Then it was my turn. She asked me to check if it looked okay to me.   I jumped out of my chair, In front of a big wide mirror….

I turned my head to the EAST and my cut looked alright.

I turned my head to WEST and everything was still alright. I turned my head to the MIRROR, and there was no light….

Pitch-Black darkness had covered the room.

Damn!! Load shedding in Bangalore. 

Good afternoon friends!!

Back in my college days, I remember being an agony aunt to my best friend. I would advise her on all the topics ranging from time management, relationships, weight management and what not! At times many of my advice would be utterly unsolicited.

Yet, today as I stand here and struggle to manage my weight; ironically none of my advice seems to work for me.

How is it that we give great advice to our friends and family but when the problem is with us or within us, all those advice are in vain? I’m sure you all would have experienced this. Efficiently giving free advice to everybody but becoming dumb-struck when it comes to us!!??

Well, having done a retrospection and being a protégé to many, I can tell exactly how we can break from this Solomon’s Paradox.

Imagine an iron knife with blunt edges. It cannot be used to cut or slice anything. Now to sharpen this knife, it must meet another piece of iron. Only when the knife is held at a right angle against another rotating iron plate, the rough edges of the knife get sharpened. And then it is ready to use.

We all are like this blunt edge of a knife. Messy, flawed, imperfect, clumsy in some or the other aspect of our lives. We all have moments when we need help and need some sharpening. And there are times when we feel razor sharp and capable of helping the other person. To sharpen our blunt edges, it is vital that we meet the right mentor who’s already polished and sharpened.   

Fortunately, I have had many experienced and polished mentors who’ve helped me grow in every big or small thing.

For instance, back then, I remember whenever my mentor started giving me feedback. I would instantly interrupt him to fill the remainder of what I would expect him to say. Or sometimes, I would respond to his feedback saying, “I know”. And my mentor really had to put tremendous efforts to change my small behavioral response from “I know” to “You’re right”. I'm sure all the mentors would have faced this.

I can also clearly recall how my mentor played a big role in changing my mindset. While it is good to be independent, it’s best to seek help and others’ perspective when needed. If it wasn’t for my mentor, I wouldn’t have been saying this here.

While I was miffed in many instances because my mentor did not give me direct answers to my problems, I’m grateful to him for teaching me ways to get to that answer. Sometimes it's not about the answer but the journey we have to travel to finds the answer.

I realize I was a fool when I was too quick to think that, my haircut looked “Right” just by checking from the left side and right side. Because maybe that cut wasn’t best for me.

As I came back home, my friend held a hand mirror in front of me. At that moment, standing in between the two parallel mirrors, not only could I see my haircut properly, but I noticed, my infinite images that were created. Perhaps the infinite images were nothing but the infinite potential that an individual has when the right mentor helps one see, what otherwise is not visible to him.

Because, the way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to counsel.

A good mentor might let u sleep with painful pangs of hunger but wouldn't let you die of starvation, true that he'll not feed you a fish but he'll teach you how to fish; which you will remember for the rest of the life.